“I sought out to find my biological family through agencies, investigators, a tv show, and ancestry.com for 30 years. In 2018, it finally happened. I had been on Ancestry.com for about 5 years, but in May I found my biological father (who’s now deceased), and in July I contacted a young gentleman on Ancestry whose father confirmed that he knew the woman I was looking for. She was his aunt!
In 1966, my birth mother, who was 23 at the time, had recently separated from the US Navy made the decision to place me up for adoption. She does not tell anyone of her plans (ever), not even my birth father. I became a ward of the state and was adopted from the Bureau of Adoption several months later by a couple who could not have children of their own. It was a sealed adoption and it took decades to unpack the belies I carried as an adoptee.
I had to unpack my emotions and realize that when I had the chance to speak with my birthmother, I would do so with love, compassion, and forgiveness. She received a letter from me releasing her of shame and the secret. And now, we’re both on a journey of discovery.
During my journey, my lowest point was during the 5th grade where I felt like I had a huge cloud hovering over me, and the lack of identity began to creep in. It messed with my heart – I carried those feelings like heavy armor until I became a mom myself! On the flip side, my highest point during the journey was when I finally could discover, uncover, and recover from all the experiences during my first conversation with my birth mother. It was surreal!
I currently work in service for the State. I oversee grants that impact the youth, I mentor young girls, especially of color. I’ve done some public speaking on my experience as a keynote and I’ve written a children’s book. I plan on vlogging very soon.” (Aurora, CA, USA)
Spirit lives in Aurora, California. She shares her journey of finding her biological family to build awareness for other adoptees. You can keep up with her work on Instagram @my.adoptee.journey.